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In A Conundrum Here....


Tyler

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[quote name='Tyler' timestamp='1307169546' post='511658']
Well I did it today, went swimming with a few friends who I feel really comfortable with and felt like people were looking for a while but then they just went back to their normal buisness. Felt uncomfortable getting out of the water to dry off but other than that things went pretty okay. Managed to get in a good 50 laps before it got crowded then threw a football around for a bit. All in all a pretty good time, got some sun and excercise and spent time with friends, can't ask for any more than that. Thanks for the support everyone it really did help me a lot reading all ya'lls comments.
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50 laps? Daaaang! Sounds like whatever weight you are carrying is going to be gone pretty quick with that kind of endurance. Keep up the good work!
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You know,Tyler,God made you as you are and God don't make shit. Everyones advice is right here. My theory, what other people think of me is none of my business. Get in front of a mirror every morning and tell yourself how perfect you are, and you are because God made you that way. Don't let media,advertising and public opinion influence what you think of yourself. Its not easy when people stare and make fun,but then it isn't your business. Your business is to enjoy life,build a relationship with God and help others. By going to the pool with out your shirt,by plunging in and swimming, you might very well encourage another overweight person to get "in the swim" of things.He will see you as brave and courageous, so youre only listening to some of the people. Do it,Tyler,just do it. Don't think about it just do it. Taking action is always better than taking no action and living in your head. Good luck and enjoy the water!
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[quote name='Coyote' timestamp='1307183351' post='511672']
[quote name='Tyler' timestamp='1307169546' post='511658']
Well I did it today, went swimming with a few friends who I feel really comfortable with and felt like people were looking for a while but then they just went back to their normal buisness. Felt uncomfortable getting out of the water to dry off but other than that things went pretty okay. Managed to get in a good 50 laps before it got crowded then threw a football around for a bit. All in all a pretty good time, got some sun and excercise and spent time with friends, can't ask for any more than that. Thanks for the support everyone it really did help me a lot reading all ya'lls comments.
[/quote]

50 laps? Daaaang! Sounds like whatever weight you are carrying is going to be gone pretty quick with that kind of endurance. Keep up the good work!
[/quote]


I hope so, 50 laps isn't much for me I used to do 100 a few months ago but I'll get back to that point soon hopefully. Without the extra help of a 'normal' metabolism it takes longer for me to lose weight but I'm trying my hardest. Thanks for the support everyone it really does help reading these comments. Honestly and with sincerity thank you all <3
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[quote name='mustafabey' timestamp='1307197541' post='511684']
You know,Tyler,God made you as you are and God don't make shit. Everyones advice is right here. My theory, what other people think of me is none of my business. Get in front of a mirror every morning and tell yourself how perfect you are, and you are because God made you that way. Don't let media,advertising and public opinion influence what you think of yourself. Its not easy when people stare and make fun,but then it isn't your business. Your business is to enjoy life,build a relationship with God and help others. By going to the pool with out your shirt,by plunging in and swimming, you might very well encourage another overweight person to get "in the swim" of things.He will see you as brave and courageous, so youre only listening to some of the people. Do it,Tyler,just do it. Don't think about it just do it. Taking action is always better than taking no action and living in your head. Good luck and enjoy the water!
[/quote]

Kinda what I was thinking, but couldn't put it to non-cheezy words.

G*d doesn't give a person a burden that they also don't get the ability to overcome.
Sometimes I see a severely handicapped person, and think that they have a much better ability to overcome their problems than I would in the same case.
Every time I find myself in a problem with seemingly no solution, I know it's there, I just have to find it.
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Well guys, again I must thank you for the support. I feel silly letting such a thing bother me so much but I guess everyone has something they hate/dislike about themselves that seems silly to other people. But tomorrow will be my true test, on my day off I will be going to the pool, alone, without the support of friends, and I plan on getting some sun, enjoying some laps (going for 55 this time!) and then kicking ass in the volleyball. It has taken a lot of work for me to actually ENJOY an active lifestyle; when I started doing things like frisbee golf, volleyball, swimming, even just throwing a football/baseball around, I alwasy thought of ways to get out of it (it's going to rain soon, its too hot, its too cold, im tired, blah blah blah) but now I actually enjoy getting out there and doing things and it's because of some very good friends both on this forum/facebook, and in real life. I really feel blessed having so much support and I hope to one day be able to help someone else out. Inshallah I'll lose my goal weight before Ramadan :)
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Im proud of ya tyler..supports one thing but its really all up to you to muster the courage to overcome whats bothering you, and you did it. being active isnt a bad thing, and stopping yourself just makes it harder to change in the end. youre def doing good for yourself!
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[quote name='brigita' timestamp='1307494675' post='512020']
I'm late to this but I say, keep trying to lose weight and eff the people who judge you. Put them all in headlocks. Then be like, "Judge me now, bitch!"
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+1
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Totally had water coming out of my nose with the headlocks thing. We should hit up hookah cafe sometime soonish.
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[quote name='Tyler' timestamp='1306689828' post='510995']
A bit of a backstory,
When I was born I had an infection in my chest that spread through my endocryn sytem and ended up having to take out my thyroid gland. Because of this I have basically zero natural metabolism and well, am overweight because of it (not that I would be skinny either way but I wouldn't be as fat as I am). I do get regular injections of hormones, pharamones, and enzymes but its only about 10% as effective as a natural course. My problem is that I love to swim, it's low impact on my joints which is good being my size and a fairly good workout I can do without becoming overly sweaty....but because of my weight I hate going to a pool when other people are there because I hate being in public without a shirt on. Recently our apartment complex's pool opened up and I would love to be able to just walk 100 yards to go do one of my favorite things, swim, and maybe get a little tanned, but I don't want to be around so many people without a shirt. I know the easy solution is to just suck it up and think that no one will care, but I can't think that in the back of their minds they're all judging me :-\
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They shouldn't judge you. Hey, you are excersizing, so that alone should keep them from doing that. Take small steps and practice. For example, go out there with your shirt on for a little while to get the feel of the area for the first time. THe second time, go out there with a couple of friends, then on the third time, go out there, take your shirt off and swim (with a couple of friends). Soon enough, you'll be swimming anytime you want!
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I wish you the best of luck in your progress, it is a tough road that I understand 100%

Psychiatric medications made me go from being a toothpick at about 155 pounds through highschool and beginning of college(2005-2006) up to 270 pounds this time last year. I used to be a lifeguard and I had man boobs and always wore a shirt to the chair when I was pretty skinny(I had lost weight to become that skinny, I was a bigger kid growing up and joining the tennis team and walking/running thirty miles on fridays in highschool helped me out).
Anyway, when I put on all that weight over the course of about 3 years from psych meds, I became very self conscious. I stopped going to pools, I stopped going without a shirt while cutting the grass, I thought everyone would be judging me and its really disturbing feeling that way...I went as far as to be semi-depressed over it. But, I realized there are people as big as me or bigger that do it, and no one says anything to them or stares, and that I never thought ill of them, so appearantly it must me in my head. I started back to the old life of being free again, but had a lot of anxiety with it. I would worry what people thought about me and it turned out no one gave a damn(part of the reason I got even more anxious and self conscious is that two of my uncles gave me crap about my weight saying I had a dickdo "where your belly sticks out further than your dick do"...the one is my boss and still cracks on me to this day). I always have this inkling about people judging me, I don't think it will ever go away, but I am comforted knowing that no one really cares except the assholes and lets face it, if they are giving you crap 1. they have something in life that is wrong for them that they have to take it out on someone else 2. who cares what someone else says when you love yourself.

I managed to get my meds changed a year ago and I've lost about 45 pounds, but I still think I'm pretty big from looking in the mirror, but I love me and tell anyone(mainly my uncle I work for) to fuck off if they have a problem with my fluffy size.

And I know about the thyroid path, its a tough one, my ex-fiance has thyroid disease and was constantly putting on weight because of it and there was nothing she could do about it. The best thing with weight problems that are out of your physical control is to have a good support network and to not give up when there seems like there is no point :)

Hang in there buddy and stay strong :)
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  • 2 weeks later...
[quote name='Tyler' timestamp='1307595455' post='512147']
Totally had water coming out of my nose with the headlocks thing. We should hit up hookah cafe sometime soonish.
[/quote]

YES!! I am always so late to this thread. Any night this week if you are available!!!
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I can relate. I used to be 6'1, 320lbs, I lost some weight and got down to 200lbs, but have put some back on and am back to around 225lbs. When I was younger and went to the pool without a shirt on, I got told I needed a 2 piece to cover my moobs. Was I self conscious? Of course. But I hear people talking about being self conscious about their weight all the time, people of all different sizes. People don't want to go to the gym because they are afraid when they run it will jiggle and people will judge them. But what I say, and has already been said is, I would never judge someone who is overweight and actively doing something to try to change that. The fact that you are putting in the effort, even though it is hard, shows motivation to make a change, and that deserves some serious props, and respect. So go swimming and be proud. If you need to wear a shirt to feel more secure, wear a shirt. If you don't want to wear a shirt, don't wear a shirt.

If you live your life for others, you are never going to please them, because it is impossible to please everyone. And if you are living to please others and you can't you aren't going to end up pleasing yourself either. So worry about pleasing who you [i]can[/i] please. Yourself. Start living for yourself and forget everyone else. Your friends and family are the ones who matter, and they aren't going to judge you for being you. If they do, they aren't your real friends. People are going to judge you no matter what. If you were ripped and pure muscle, walking down the street people might judge you thinking you are nothing more than a meat head. If you're skinny people might think you have an eating disorder or are too skinny. People are always going to find something to judge you on. If it isn't your weight, it might be your height, it might be your hair, or the way you dress.

A couple years ago I went camping with a bunch of friends. One of them is heavier set, and asked if I was going to wear a t-shirt swimming, and I asked him why I would do that? He asked if I was self conscious, and I said "Why should I be? We are all friends here, so who cares?" He has been swimming without a shirt since.
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Yo I'ma chime in. I shoot hoops every week and I wear basketball shorts (the long kind) and a wife beater. I have a big gut and then some but I don't give a fuck what people think - And I'll be hanging around 8 and 9 year-olds at daycamp when I play (at a public park). They're the most judgmental. Some people in the thread said that others are gonna judge you. I have one question in response to acknowledging that:

Why give a fuck what people think?

In matters as trivial as a stranger's perception of you, why get bent out of shape? Easier said than done, I know, but it's an attitude worth adopting for trivial circumstances. Hang in there, bro, and keep doin' what you do.
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  • 4 weeks later...
Just a quick update on my progress, been about a month now of swimming 5-6 days a week (usually rains once a week now) I can't say that I've lost a lot of weight or inches but I definately feel much better about myself and have a lot more energy. Still have self-esteem issues but I'll get over it in due time inshallah
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[quote name='mushrat' timestamp='1308920847' post='513543']
Grooven. Keep up the good work. The thing that bothers some of them the most is that you are actually exercising while they sit on their asses. :)
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You're right, MUSH! I'd give you a plus one if I could. Keep up the good work, TY, you're doing great!
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