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Relationships That Doesn't Involve Sex.


modisess

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QUOTE (Canon @ Mar 26 2009, 05:48 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (modisess @ Mar 26 2009, 03:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Just a thought, do you guys think it's possible to be/stay in a relationship where the two partners has no sexual tension/attraction at all towards each other?

What I mean by this is that the two partners has a lot in common, personality wise, interests, and they have good conversation with each other. Only thing is, they just don't have any sexual attraction towards each other. Is this possible?

sure, just get married


OMG soo true,,

Seriously speaking, I personally have never had a friend of the opposite sex that I wasnt sexually attracted to. I might have told them " I dont think of you that way" but deep down I knew it wasnt true.. And in most of those relationships the sexual tension eventually bubbled to the surface and was released wink.gif
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QUOTE (fcbayern @ Mar 26 2009, 09:02 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Canon @ Mar 26 2009, 05:48 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (modisess @ Mar 26 2009, 03:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Just a thought, do you guys think it's possible to be/stay in a relationship where the two partners has no sexual tension/attraction at all towards each other?

What I mean by this is that the two partners has a lot in common, personality wise, interests, and they have good conversation with each other. Only thing is, they just don't have any sexual attraction towards each other. Is this possible?

sure, just get married


OMG soo true,,

Seriously speaking, I personally have never had a friend of the opposite sex that I wasnt sexually attracted to. I might have told them " I dont think of you that way" but deep down I knew it wasnt true.. And in most of those relationships the sexual tension eventually bubbled to the surface and was released wink.gif


I dunno, I've had female friends who i have definitely not been attracted to, but were really cool to be hang out with. (no fat chicks though)
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A relationship without sex is doomed to fail from the start.

Its not really a relationship until there is sex involved... until then its just being friends.
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QUOTE (Hippo_Master @ Mar 26 2009, 03:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (fcbayern @ Mar 26 2009, 09:02 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Canon @ Mar 26 2009, 05:48 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (modisess @ Mar 26 2009, 03:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Just a thought, do you guys think it's possible to be/stay in a relationship where the two partners has no sexual tension/attraction at all towards each other?

What I mean by this is that the two partners has a lot in common, personality wise, interests, and they have good conversation with each other. Only thing is, they just don't have any sexual attraction towards each other. Is this possible?

sure, just get married


OMG soo true,,

Seriously speaking, I personally have never had a friend of the opposite sex that I wasnt sexually attracted to. I might have told them " I dont think of you that way" but deep down I knew it wasnt true.. And in most of those relationships the sexual tension eventually bubbled to the surface and was released wink.gif


I dunno, I've had female friends who i have definitely not been attracted to, but were really cool to be hang out with. (no fat chicks though)


I disagree - you know if any of those girls was liike "I want to bang, right now" then you would totally hit it. I know I would.
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QUOTE (ahwahoo2006 @ Mar 26 2009, 12:21 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Hippo_Master @ Mar 26 2009, 03:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (fcbayern @ Mar 26 2009, 09:02 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Canon @ Mar 26 2009, 05:48 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (modisess @ Mar 26 2009, 03:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Just a thought, do you guys think it's possible to be/stay in a relationship where the two partners has no sexual tension/attraction at all towards each other?

What I mean by this is that the two partners has a lot in common, personality wise, interests, and they have good conversation with each other. Only thing is, they just don't have any sexual attraction towards each other. Is this possible?

sure, just get married


OMG soo true,,

Seriously speaking, I personally have never had a friend of the opposite sex that I wasnt sexually attracted to. I might have told them " I dont think of you that way" but deep down I knew it wasnt true.. And in most of those relationships the sexual tension eventually bubbled to the surface and was released wink.gif


I dunno, I've had female friends who i have definitely not been attracted to, but were really cool to be hang out with. (no fat chicks though)


I disagree - you know if any of those girls was liike "I want to bang, right now" then you would totally hit it. I know I would.




EXACTLY wink.gif
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i think you guys are missing the point, though the conclusions are the same.

he's saying, there's no sexual attraction. it's not, "I want to have sex with you, but I won't." It's more like, "I'd have sex with you, but I'm not drunk enough yet."

HAHAHA...just kidding. But, yeah...he's talking about the absence of the desire, not the act. Edited by arcane
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QUOTE (tinyj316 @ Mar 26 2009, 09:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A relationship without sex is doomed to fail from the start.

Its not really a relationship until there is sex involved... until then its just being friends.


So a friendship isnt a relationship.

Also my girlfriend and i have been together for going on 5 years and never had intercourse.

Our relationship is great.
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QUOTE (SimplexCoda @ Mar 26 2009, 02:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (tinyj316 @ Mar 26 2009, 09:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A relationship without sex is doomed to fail from the start.

Its not really a relationship until there is sex involved... until then its just being friends.


So a friendship isnt a relationship.

Also my girlfriend and i have been together for going on 5 years and never had intercourse.

Our relationship is great.



weird
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I guess that is a personal decision on their part. I wouldnt be happy with it, sex is too great! If you really like the person, sex is even better!
I have lots of friends, both male and female, that I have spent talking with for hours on end, and some sexual attraction, but I didnt do anything about it, because were friends.
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I don't believe a relationship without sex can be that successful or prosperous. There is just a highest point in a relationship you can only reach by doing everything right and being happily involved in sexual intimacy with that person. Even if everything between the two people is literally perfect with the exception of intimacy, the couple that has that AND intimacy is hundreds of times better off if not more happy.
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You know i just dont see how people can say that a relationship without sex cant be prosperous. I know that sex is great and all, but sometimes i think it just needs to not be the deciding factor in weather or not a relationship can work. Seriously if you cant make a relationship work without having sex involved, i think there are some deeper emotional issues that need to be resolved. Im not sayin dont have sex, im sayin that it should be reserved.
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QUOTE (SimplexCoda @ Mar 26 2009, 04:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You know i just dont see how people can say that a relationship without sex cant be prosperous. I know that sex is great and all, but sometimes i think it just needs to not be the deciding factor in weather or not a relationship can work. Seriously if you cant make a relationship work without having sex involved, i think there are some deeper emotional issues that need to be resolved. Im not sayin dont have sex, im sayin that it should be reserved.


I don't think anyone was saying it was a deciding factor, but to deny it is a large and important factor would be kind of silly imo.


There are deep levels of emotional connectivity that people reach when they engage in sex in the proper mindsets. Levels that absolutely can not be reached otherwise. Edited by PaperAlchemist
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QUOTE (PaperAlchemist @ Mar 26 2009, 06:01 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (SimplexCoda @ Mar 26 2009, 04:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You know i just dont see how people can say that a relationship without sex cant be prosperous. I know that sex is great and all, but sometimes i think it just needs to not be the deciding factor in weather or not a relationship can work. Seriously if you cant make a relationship work without having sex involved, i think there are some deeper emotional issues that need to be resolved. Im not sayin dont have sex, im sayin that it should be reserved.


I don't think anyone was saying it was a deciding factor, but to deny it is a large and important factor would be kind of silly imo.


There are deep levels of emotional connectivity that people reach when they engage in sex in the proper mindsets. Levels that absolutely can not be reached otherwise.


Oh i totally agree, that its important. But to say that a relationship cant work with out just is silly.

But gettin back to the original topic:
It depends on what type of relationship we are talking about. I have many female friends that i dont find my self attracted to. I have many other female friends that i am attracted to. But, if we are talking dating or that type of relationship, i think there needs to be sexual attraction. Why would you marry someone your not willing to have sex with?
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QUOTE (fcbayern @ Mar 26 2009, 10:35 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (ahwahoo2006 @ Mar 26 2009, 12:21 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Hippo_Master @ Mar 26 2009, 03:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (fcbayern @ Mar 26 2009, 09:02 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Canon @ Mar 26 2009, 05:48 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (modisess @ Mar 26 2009, 03:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Just a thought, do you guys think it's possible to be/stay in a relationship where the two partners has no sexual tension/attraction at all towards each other?

What I mean by this is that the two partners has a lot in common, personality wise, interests, and they have good conversation with each other. Only thing is, they just don't have any sexual attraction towards each other. Is this possible?

sure, just get married


OMG soo true,,

Seriously speaking, I personally have never had a friend of the opposite sex that I wasnt sexually attracted to. I might have told them " I dont think of you that way" but deep down I knew it wasnt true.. And in most of those relationships the sexual tension eventually bubbled to the surface and was released wink.gif


I dunno, I've had female friends who i have definitely not been attracted to, but were really cool to be hang out with. (no fat chicks though)


I disagree - you know if any of those girls was liike "I want to bang, right now" then you would totally hit it. I know I would.




EXACTLY wink.gif


I must re-disagree, I am really only attracted to hot girls. wink.gif . Would not have been able to get it up with a pound of Extenz in my system.

What other ways can you show how much you are attracted to another person and make them feel good about themselves (unless you are a sexual failure)? Words? Ha, she'll be out looking for sex in no time.
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QUOTE (Hippo_Master @ Mar 25 2009, 05:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (joytron @ Mar 25 2009, 04:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
is one of them really ugly?


thats the only way i could see that happening. i mean its hard enough to find someone who shares remotely the same interests in life and who doesnt want to kill me after spending six hours together, so if there is any general attractiveness im all over it


Seriously.. maybe they both are so ugly neither of them want to touch the other, but both are so nice they don't want to say or do anything to hurt the other's feelings.

Aww so caring! sleep.gif


DOUBLE WIN.

Maybe both partners are asexual? If that's not the case, I'd say that not having sexual drive and not feeling physically attracted to your partner has got to be an indicator of some serious issues. Hope no one takes offense at this statement, but given that we are animals (homo sapiens sapiens) and procreation is basically our goal as a species, libido is pretty much hardwired into our brains.

I mean seriously, remember the middle ages and the whole deal about the knights only expressing platonic love for their dames? Look where that got us: the Crusaders' tour to the Middle East... no less than nine times tongue.gif
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QUOTE (tinyj316 @ Mar 26 2009, 10:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A relationship without sex is doomed to fail from the start.

Its not really a relationship until there is sex involved... until then its just being friends.


I totally disagree with you. You could fall in love and have feelings for someone and be attracted to them and not have sex with them. Most people who are like off the boat from past generations espescially middle eastern, italian, jews etc... never had sex until they were married alot of people dated but sexual activity wasn't so weid open as it is now. i mean their is no body who can't get laid now with all the internet websites craigslist, myspace etc.... so just because sex is extremley open in our generation doesnt mean that you have to have sex with someone in order to love the but you must be physically and sexually attracted to them and thats my two cents
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QUOTE (modisess @ Mar 25 2009, 02:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (GNUWorldOrder @ Mar 25 2009, 10:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
isnt that just being friends then?


not really, i mean they are a couple, the feeling's there, but they just dont have sex with each other.


heh, I know the feeling sorta...but my case is because of living with parents and she is too...
completely connected in all ways. its still intimate, just not at that extreme level, but then again...

its a tough one
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There can be a relationship without sexual attraction. It's called friendship. We have tons of relationships in our lives. The root word in relationship is "relate." The way you relate can be different but there's always a connection. If they consider themselves in a relationship, then they have a relationship. If they consider it a boyfriend/girlfriend kind of thing, fine. I dont think it's our place to tell you (OP) whether or not they are in a serious relationship that is asexual. Most of us are in our late teens or early 20s and honestly have NO idea how to handle a serious intimate relationship where marriage may eventually become a possibility. We just dont yet, not till our brains have come out of party-land and landed on earth. That could be in our early 20s, but most of the time it happens after college and as we start to get comfortable in our careers. Once that happens, we have the stress capacity and financial stability to think about kids and marriage. Maybe they are one step ahead of the rest of us. Starting off as friends and building a bond without the chain of sex hanging around their necks.
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  • 2 weeks later...
sex is just an angle of intimacy. Kissing is a form of intimacy, as is hugging, as is simply leaning on each other on the couch while watching a movie...so is giving each other massages.

The problem is many of these activities often co-exist with sex...so I would say it can happen, but is very unlikely.

The only time I was in such a relationship, I wanted to bang her silly and fuck her stupid...but she didn't want to mess up our friendship....I think that was her way of saying "You look like a small bear, I think I'll keep you around to scare off any future Ex-boyfriends" tongue.gif
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  • 2 weeks later...
i think sex is the icing on the cake you dont need it at first to have a heathy relationship and if you have all the other things in common the sexual attraction will come
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  • 3 weeks later...
QUOTE (modisess @ Mar 25 2009, 11:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Hippo_Master @ Mar 25 2009, 10:45 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (modisess @ Mar 25 2009, 12:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (GNUWorldOrder @ Mar 25 2009, 10:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
isnt that just being friends then?


not really, i mean they are a couple, the feeling's there, but they just dont have sex with each other.


Ohhhh are the Catholic... or just religious in general? (you know, the whole abstinence thing...)


no no no, just no sexual attraction at all. no religion involved.


its possible but one, or possibly both, are married and its a side thing
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